Did you know?

That I'm not supposed to be alive right now?
That I'm not supposed to be turning 18 in less than two months?
That I should be dead.
It's true.
I'm supposed to be dead. Gone. Buried.
But I'm not.
I'm still here.
Unloveable as ever.
And even less trusting.
And even more afraid.
Lord, help me...
I'm not supposed to be alive.
I am though.
I am alive.
Lord, I pray that I will serve a purpose in my lifetime.